How my parents turned a slacker into a hard worker

[Dreamlander]

In middle school, I was a huge slacker. I had a huge problem with doing my work. It got pretty bad, I'm pretty sure there was times where I had C's and D's in all my classes. I did a really good job of hiding my bad grades from my parents, but it wasn't good enough. When my parents found out, they would straight up ground me and micromanage every waking moment of my life. It was horrible, I hated it. And the thing is, this happened way too many times in middle school. Eventually I got sick of it, and decided to work hard for semester and do all my work. My grades immediately improved, and instead of being grounded all the time, my parents gave me free reign to do whatever I wanted. Believing the torture was over, I immediately went back to my old ways... and ended up getting grounded once more. It was from this cycle of getting grounded, then working hard and getting good grades, then becoming lazy again, then getting grounded once more, that I learned to become a master at time management. We are evolutionary inclined to be lazy, but my parents taught me that the consequences of being are lazy are very bad. Now, I honestly shudder at the thought of not doing my work.

 

[fords8]

You learned a lesson that many kids never learn.

 

[Selena]

Your post reminds me of a less metal, less intense, alternate, positive version of Metallica's song Dyers Eve. You're lucky to have had parents like that.

When I was born, I had extreme shyness. And, with no video games, I chose to read and get work done. It got to a point where even when video games were introduced into my life, I still did my work to help the people around me. There's a great joy in teaching others and assisting with their academic development.

Yet, I think my biggest inspiration was my mother, who literally had my brother at 15, me at 22, and still went to high school and had a job. Of course, my father did help, but she did most of the work herself. Despite their ambitions, my brother and I went through five houses together, where we were even homeless for a week. My goal in life is to ensure my family's financial security, so I looked towards engineering to fulfill it because honestly, it's way more fun than english and history to me.

 

[Dreamlander]

You learned a lesson that many kids never learn.

Yep. And it seems a lot of people have yet to learn it even in college. My friend for example, he's a really bright guy, but he can't get his work done. He gets distracted. He just can't shut out all the distractions and do it. And as a result he's failing two classes.

Your post reminds me of a less metal, less intense, alternate, positive version of Metallica's song Dyers Eve. You're lucky to have had parents like that.

When I was born, I had extreme shyness. And, with no video games, I chose to read and get work done. It got to a point where even when video games were introduced into my life, I still did my work to help the people around me. There's a great joy in teaching others and assisting with their academic development.

Yet, I think my biggest inspiration was my mother, who literally had my brother at 15, me at 22, and still went to high school and had a job. Of course, my father did help, but she did most of the work herself. Despite their ambitions, my brother and I went through five houses together, where we were even homeless for a week. My goal in life is to ensure my family's financial security, so I looked towards engineering to fulfill it because honestly, it's way more fun than english and history to me.

That sounds like a strange opposite from my Dad's life story. He was born in 1956 and had seven siblings (six now, as one died from Down syndrome when my Dad was still very young). Seven siblings, all brothers. My Grandpa died in 1969 at the age of 49, when my Dad was 12. My Grandma (who died about two weeks ago), was left to raise her 7 sons. She basically went crazy and starting abusing them. They also beat up each other. My Dad has told me how his older brothers would tie him to a chair and lock him in the hot attack. My Grandma ended up remarrying another guy. He ended up dying a few years later, but not before he kicked my Dad out right when he turned 18. My Dad decided he wanted to go to college (the first in his family), so that summer after high school he lived in a walk in closet where he worked a job to pay for college. He ended up going, and eventually got a JD.

My Dad told me how his Mom never really supported him, not even emotionally. He said there was a disconnection between them. But he also said they made up when she was on her deathbed. Even so, at the funeral, he wasn't extremely emotional or anything.

 

[Selena]

That sounds like a strange opposite from my Dad's life story. He was born in 1956 and had seven siblings (six now, as one died from Down syndrome when my Dad was still very young). Seven siblings, all brothers. My Grandpa died in 1969 at the age of 49, when my Dad was 12. My Grandma (who died about two weeks ago), was left to raise her 7 sons. She basically went crazy and starting abusing them. They also beat up each other. My Dad has told me how his older brothers would tie him to a chair and lock him in the hot attack. My Grandma ended up remarrying another guy. He ended up dying a few years later, but not before he kicked my Dad out right when he turned 18. My Dad decided he wanted to go to college (the first in his family), so that summer after high school he lived in a walk in closet where he worked a job to pay for college. He ended up going, and eventually got a JD.

Hm, I remember my grandmother who had to get up every morning and work at the ranch to make enough money for the essentials in life. That's mainly why we are now in the United States, for the greater opportunity this country provided back then and even now in some cases. However, I don't know if my grandparents and great grandparents got here illegally (the details elude me), but now that they're here, they have easier jobs, better homes, and just an easier lifestyle in general. Heck, one of my uncles owns a salon in a wealthy city. I've always known discipline because of this. My generation still experienced some hardships, but not to the extent that my parents and their parents had to face, and for that, I'm dearly grateful.

And by the way, I know for a fact that my father arrived in this country illegally. Luckily, he married my mom and became a resident.

 

[fords8]

Talk to your mom and dad about your family history. You will find out some very interesting facts.

The school in town had records for my great uncles and my uncles. We go back about 85 years in town. That is what I can prove anyways. I am sure we go back over 100 years.

 

[Jason2022]

I'm not sure if forcing kids to work really does the job. In reality, it might be better to let them fall on their rear, while at the same time, being a positive role model.