My son is 13. It does not matter what the subject, it is turned into an argument.
Me: Son, did you clean the litter box?
Son: Again? OMG doesn't the cat quit... grumble mumble ect
Me; Its every day, sometimes twice, it needs to be done
Son: OMG I can't believe this.. everyday grumble grumble
Nothing has changed since we brought the cat in here, it is his job to clean the litter box. Not every other day, its every day and sometimes twice.
Me: Did you put your book bag away?
Son: I am just gonna have to do homework in a while, whats the difference?
Me: The difference is I said put the bag away.
Son: Grumble mumble who knows what under his breath
Me: Did you take care of your lunch box?
Son: I'll get to it when I do my homework.
Me: Yea and I am doing dishes now, so I'd like it now
Son: grumble mumble under his breath....
Me: Son, grab your clothes and put them away please. (now picture it, I have washed dried folded or mated their socks, underwear, hung their jeans and shirts on hangers... all they have to do is carry it up the stairs to the drawer or closet!
Son: OMG anything else today?
And you know the fight began with this wisecrack!
Mind you these folks do no chores. It is not like they are overwhelmed although I am re-thinking this idea. Maybe they need chores.
So my question is, is this normal 13 year old behavior or is this total disrespecting bratting? It sure as **** can not continue, just wondering if this is normal for any one else's house?
Thanks! I don't want to ride them to rough and be over bearing, kwim, yet I refuse to be a doormat and allow them to treat me like ****. I am trying to find the middle ground right now. Wondering how much is normal behavior for young teens and which is just .... wrong
My 14yo doesn't generally do the mumble grumble thing, although he doesn't generally do the thing I asked him to do either :lol: until I tell him that this is the last time I'm asking before I take something away ..... then it tends to get done in a flash :didi:
DH always gave me **** for asking them rather than telling them to doing things around the house but I didn't have as difficult time with getting them to do things as he did. When I suggested that he be the issuer of allowance, thinking that was the bias, things still didn't change for him. Honey/vinegar?
EVERYTHING in my house is a argument with my 15yr DS. I wonder the same thing most days....is my kid the only one that acts like this? I sometimes think there is no way I will make it through the teen years with my DS and then I remember I still have to go through it with my 10yr DS :surrender:I will be very surprised if we all make it out of this alive :giggles:
Tonight, when he made the comment to the cat of "doesn't he ever quit" meaning doesn't the cat quit pooping in the box... seriously, it was all I could do not to say and treat him like :dunce: I was nice, non-snarky but could not help but think is today any different then any other day this week? Month? Year? The cleaning of the box has been a daily argument for over a year.
I want the cat to poop in and ONLY in the box, really. I want the arguments to stifle!
i feel your frustration. i have a 19 son. sorry to say does not get better. only if he wants something. i gave up right now and do the "chore" myself. he was to do dishes but somehow that became a event that takes hours to do. i rather just do it myself in minutes not hours, plus everything is clean. i have him mow the lawn 1 time a week and that is it.
everything i ask i get the same response you do. i do find myself making dinner less and less cause if i come home and have to do their chores.
their dinner is not on top of the list. i will make me something and they can have the leftovers from the night before. that i made and they did not eat.
glad to hear i am not alone.
How quickly little boys turn from angels to **** holes (you may need to change your screen name)....13 is a stressful time for young'ns. Try getting him to talk to you--work out some of his issues...if you don't kill him prior to him turning 19 he'll turn back into an angel.
i have three boys too and they r 15 almost 13 and the baby is 5 normal behaver ...i just want to smack the attitude out of the older 2 some days...cant u do it ..well yeah i just worked 9 hours it would do me more pleasure to do it for u ..dinner can wait till i have the dishes done that u shouldve had done before i got home ...the only thing they do around here is pick up there rooms and take trash out...and they complain i make them do everything in this house and i shouldnt be so hard on them ..2 at one time it is a challange and someone might not come out alive...i am thinking it could be me since it is 2 against one and my oldest is already bigger then me ....lol...i pick alot of my battles but they seem to be the longest drawn out battles ever..
When we have a rough patch I just write stuff down on a list for him and hand it to him, be sure to include a time you want it done or he'll be doing choses at midnight. My kid LOVES to try to skip chores by making everything into a debate so the list takes out the verbal back and forth. And if he tries to start a debate I just point to the list.
This summer I gave my kid all my daily chores. Dishes, laundry, little boxes (6 cats!), cleaning floors. After about a month of it he has a new look at what I do everyday for this household. He still rolls his eyes and sighs but stuff gets done with no drama.
Plus everything he says... 6 more months and I can drive I remind him that 2 1/2 years and I can kick him out. It's kinda a joke but he knows it is the truth!
For me its DD14 that's more challenging than DS13. However, I think its a teen thing....you know....testing the limits. Just like when they were really little although the "game" has changed.
My girlfriend (with grown boys) once told me it gets better. One day they wake up and they are wonderful men. It seems to take forever to get there but it makes everything you have endured well worth it. The bond between mother/son is AWESOME. Until then......keep smilinghew:
did you steal my son!!!? i have no advice, we are in the same boat. what i really hate is that when we leave the house to go anywhere, all he does is makes a grumble and snide remark about every single thing i am looking at in the store. it takes twice as long to shop when he is with because he picks on every single move i make. he is the most extreme homebody. ugh!
Exactly, linkin. I will announce ok, in x amount of minutes, we need to go to Jewel, piggly wiggly, walmart, target, where ever. The grumble begins because he doesn't want (WANT) to go there. I then explain I need this product, so get ready. Again, I do not WANT to go. I am to the point now of telling him life is not about wants as I never WANT to clean toilets, dirty clothes or wash dishes but they must get done. Quit whining and get ready. Then the argument of I wasn't whining. Ummm ok sugarplum put whatever name ya like on, it doesn't change that you are going and your attitude is sucking at this point.
and the most annoying thing is that he clings to my side critiquing EVERY SINGLE ITEM I LOOK AT! geez, get a life! "oh look! like we really need more hangers!" oh , really mom, do we need soap? when can we leave? why are we here? can we go yet? you did not tell me we had to go anywhere today! why couldn't i stay home? who really needs this? didn't we buy that last time? interspersed with the very rare, ooooh look mom, i need this xbox game!! i promise i will play it!!! (never to be played) argghhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! done ranting, he will make a perfect hubby, just like his dad someday that is exactly the same. we never ever, ever go to the mall, what a pain they both are there, they of course gang up on us. and i myself really do not like to shop, so i know where he is coming from, but REALLY!!!
