Cheating or having Affairs?
- Thread starter Naiwen
- Start date
You are both wrong because you are both painting the picture with your own imagination.
Firstly, it's wrong to write the question as "When a man cheats on his wife or gf". Women cheat on men too, so lets not get gender specific here.
Jason you said the man is to blame and the gf or wife completely believed in him but he deceived her..... where at all in this thread did it say she believed in him? You painted that part of the story yourself.
Naiwen you said both are to blame, but how can you say both are to blame when you have no actual story to judge from. It's like you are saying whenever one person cheats on another then both people are always to blame regardless of the situation.
Firstly, it's wrong to write the question as "When a man cheats on his wife or gf". Women cheat on men too, so lets not get gender specific here.
Jason you said the man is to blame and the gf or wife completely believed in him but he deceived her..... where at all in this thread did it say she believed in him? You painted that part of the story yourself.
Naiwen you said both are to blame, but how can you say both are to blame when you have no actual story to judge from. It's like you are saying whenever one person cheats on another then both people are always to blame regardless of the situation.
GamerPerfection said:
Yes, exactly what I was gonna say. Both parties have responsabilities in this. Not only 1 person's fault. & the topic is specifically about when the husband's or boyfriend's having an affair, not the girl or the woman in the relationship or marriage.
Ms Naiwen said:
Again, you don't understand. You can't say both parties are at fault and you can't say that it's not only 1 persons fault, without a scenario!
How do you know if both parties are at fault? You don't know because there is no scenario. Every relationship, every affair is different, based on different things and therefore without a scenario you cannot say who is to blame.
And why is this topic only about the man having an affair? Rather sexist is it not? What is the difference between a man having an affair and the woman having an affair? Does it change anything as to who is to blame? I don't think it does, therefore what is the point in making a specifically about the man having an affair. Again, very sexist of you.
No, not saying women or girlfriends can't cheat or there aren't female partners who'd do it to the husband & that the guy can't get hurt from this (when did I say this anyway?you just presumed I said so), there are too, just saying in the case when the man does, then, for her, who's the culprit? Her husband or boyfriend, de facto or automatically, yes? Which is, yes granted, a one-sided or a very sexist conclusion or viewpoint from her part. But emotionally speaking, she can't help it, but to feel this way about her predicament.
Now, I'm trying to "defend" the one who seduced the husband in this case. Which case? In the situation where the man or husband's the one who seduced another woman while being married to his wife, regardless of her (the mistress') feelings for the man or blaming it on "the temptress" saying : "I didn't mean to do it, wasn't my fault, it's because of her that I strayed" & using her as an "excuse" to defend himself in front of his wife. & Precisely like Jason said. Such men are despicable to me.
Now, I'm trying to "defend" the one who seduced the husband in this case. Which case? In the situation where the man or husband's the one who seduced another woman while being married to his wife, regardless of her (the mistress') feelings for the man or blaming it on "the temptress" saying : "I didn't mean to do it, wasn't my fault, it's because of her that I strayed" & using her as an "excuse" to defend himself in front of his wife. & Precisely like Jason said. Such men are despicable to me.
At what point did i say you said those things? Don't bloody tell me i'm presuming something when I never did.Ms Naiwen said:
All I can say is you are 100% sexist. Why can you not have such a debate using a sexless scenario. Why does your scenario have to be about the man that is cheating? What difference does the outcome have if it's the man that's cheating and not the woman? You can have the same debate without specifying which person in the relationship is cheating, yet you seem so sexist that you point the finger at the man by making this topic only about the man and then saying such men are despicable.Ms Naiwen said:
Women like you make me sick.
Yep see here, because all women & men are sexist somewhat, to some degree, there's nothing we can do about it. & this is based on one's opinions & personal feelings & therefore biased perspective about the thing in question, which is why this is called a controversy. & the man would have a different view on this, which is fine too, eh? Wouldn't you say the same about female cheaters in a relationship or marriage, yeah? & the answer to "who's fault is it?" really depends on the person's gender (the one being cheated on's, the other person's & the unfaithful partner's).
But if the Woman's going through it, make no mistake... it's always gonna be the Man's fault. Since she's a female, she can't say otherwise or admit it's her fault. But that's not MY real view, I'm just being sympathetic to her in this situation. & Because I'm a woman, I can't take a male's side in this. So I am indeed sexist. How can I not be?
But if the Woman's going through it, make no mistake... it's always gonna be the Man's fault. Since she's a female, she can't say otherwise or admit it's her fault. But that's not MY real view, I'm just being sympathetic to her in this situation. & Because I'm a woman, I can't take a male's side in this. So I am indeed sexist. How can I not be?
& you refused to answer the spefic case or haven't understood it & argued about how females could be cheaters too (which is true also, but that's not the point here) & said I was sexist, (which I'll admit to be) by giving you such a situation (picturing the man as a cheater) & saying there needs to be a specific case when I gave you one since the beginnin of the thread : when the husband is the cheater, is it the man's or the "other woman's" fault? & that's the answer I wanna know or have.
But you have given NO case. There is no background, no story as to what led to the male cheating. You have nothing but a man and woman and the man cheated. How can you lay any blame without knowing the facts that led to the cheating. Obviously the man is at fault, but you cannot say whether another party is to blame or not unless you have the story behind the scenario.
Do you understand that you cannot claim to know whether the female is partly to blame unless you know what led to the man to cheat.
Therefore you have NOT given a specific case. All you have stated is which sex cheated. How can you base any judgement on that? It's like judging a book based on its cover.
Do you understand that you cannot claim to know whether the female is partly to blame unless you know what led to the man to cheat.
Therefore you have NOT given a specific case. All you have stated is which sex cheated. How can you base any judgement on that? It's like judging a book based on its cover.