Need some Advice

[a_s_b]

... she wrote down the 3 questions with the answer that she put. She was going to come home check for the answer and hope to put that answer tomorrow if her teacher would let her finish the test.

I'm trying to understand why anybody is talking about the intent to cheat, as if it's something separate from cheating (i.e. "she didn't cheat, but she intended to").

Plain and simple, she did cheat. The teacher prevented her success.

If the teacher didn't catch her, and the next day came, she would have amended her answers as needed. Wasn't that the plan?

Ultimately, she cheated, and got caught. She gets the zero, and what you do at home about it is your prerogative.

And as far as the way the teacher handled the situation, I can tell you that in all of my school years, whether it was me, or any other kids, we were never afforded some form of dignity, where the teacher would keep us after class and tell us our fate without any other kids around. It was public, and it was intended to shame.

We as a society teach our kids about the kinds of things that we've deemed acceptable as a society, so the kids laughing at her and calling her a cheater is merely a result of what's been taught to them ... that cheating is wrong, and we should look down upon those that cheat.

Ultimately, she'll be watched closer during tests in the near future (and perhaps beyond), and that should be just fine, because she shouldn't be cheating in the future, thus there's nothing to catch.

 

[focadima]

and not to beat a dead horse--BUT maybe YOU could tell her it's okay to get some answers wrong--LOL--it doesn't mean your a bad student. She is putting some serious pressure on herself at an early age

 

[a_s_b]

I usually tell the kid very simply, that if she can't answer the question, it's a clear indicator that she needs to educate herself to learn the answer. Doing it any other way will never be the better way.

 

[amszyh]

Plain and simple, she did cheat. The teacher prevented her success.

If the teacher didn't catch her, and the next day came, she would have amended her answers as needed. Wasn't that the plan?

Ultimately, she cheated, and got caught. She gets the zero, and what you do at home about it is your prerogative.
...
Ultimately, she'll be watched closer during tests in the near future (and perhaps beyond), and that should be just fine, because she shouldn't be cheating in the future, thus there's nothing to catch.

ITA! I also don't get why she wrote down the answers she put to check them....Why not just write the questions? wouldn't she have just looked up the correct answers and brought that piece of paper with her the next day? Were the questions she had written confirmed to be on the test? Were the answers she had written correct?

I do feel bad though. It's just a bad situation and I'm sure she feels awful. And I think the consequences are severe enough she'll be scared to ever do it again.

 

[babie]

She does feel awful and she has learned her lesson. She is embarrased. It is good to get some input from others. I feel alot better knowing that i told the teacher that we respect any decision that she made in regards to what grade she gets on her test.

 

[a_s_b]

She does feel awful and she has learned her lesson. She is embarrased. It is good to get some input from others. I feel alot better knowing that i told the teacher that we respect any decision that she made in regards to what grade she gets on her test.

Yeah ya know, it's tough, because unless it's normal for a kid to cheat, they'll usually feel horrible after doing so.

I cheated one time, back in 7th grade. I was trying to maintain my rate of 100% success on tests in that class (math), and wasn't sure about my answer to one lone question.

A friend of mine tossed me the pencil he was using, which had all the answers etched along one ridge of the thing. The teacher caught me, because I suddenly had a yellow pencil, rather than my typical blue pencil.

I felt like **** for a couple weeks. I disappointed my parents, who couldn't understand why that one single answer was so **** important, even after I explained my reason.

As for some of the kids in the class, they always gave me a hard time saying that I probably scored so well all the time because I was cheating. Ugh!

As for my buddy, I never mentioned the fact that it was his pencil. I figured, he may have given me the pencil, but I shouldn't have ever asked for it.

 

[fords8]

Yeah ya know, it's tough, because unless it's normal for a kid to cheat, they'll usually feel horrible after doing so.

I cheated one time, back in 7th grade. I was trying to maintain my rate of 100% success on tests in that class (math), and wasn't sure about my answer to one lone question.

A friend of mine tossed me the pencil he was using, which had all the answers etched along one ridge of the thing. The teacher caught me, because I suddenly had a yellow pencil, rather than my typical blue pencil.

I felt like **** for a couple weeks. I disappointed my parents, who couldn't understand why that one single answer was so **** important, even after I explained my reason.

As for some of the kids in the class, they always gave me a hard time saying that I probably scored so well all the time because I was cheating. Ugh!

As for my buddy, I never mentioned the fact that it was his pencil. I figured, he may have given me the pencil, but I shouldn't have ever asked for it.

That really sucks cause then you got a stigma.. and all those tests that you DIDN'T cheat on people then began to question.... that sucks!

 

[newfly]

I can still remember the one and only time I "sort of" cheated.

Was in college and they had us "sit" an exam at two different times. Why? No idea. Of course all of my friends sat the first group and then we all went to lunch and all they did was talk about the questions and how hard the exam was. Of course I went and studied up on those - had about an hour between lunch and when I took the exam. I didn't expect the second group to get the exact same test, but I did expect the same topics to be covered.

Sure enough it was the exact same test and I think I got 90+% when every one else got around 60%. I was called in and complimented - was never even accused of cheating. I screwed everyone out of a bell curve.

It is nearly 20 years later and I still feel guilty.

 

[boyzrus]

I think you did the right thing with the teacher. With another parent tThis could have turned ugly with them telling the teacher they weren't being fair, etc.

You let the teacher know you were on the same page and addressing the issue which really supports her ruling.

No, it wasn't technically cheating, but close enough that the teacher thought it was. It would be a good time to talk about how you can get in trouble for looking like you are doing something wrong even though you aren't.