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The Welfare Check

J

JoeChartreuse

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A guy walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check.

He marched straight up to the counter and said, "Hi. You know...., I just
HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job."

The social worker behind the counter said, "Your timing is excellent. We
just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a Chauffeur
and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You'll have to drive around in
his 2011 Mercedes-Benz CL, and he will supply all of your clothes.

"Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll also be expected
to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say but you will also have as part of your job assignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her mid-20's and has a rather strong sex drive."

The guy, just plain wide-eyed, said, "You're bull$hi**n' me!"


The social worker said, "Yeah, well ... You started it."
 
roflol. Most people on welfare are living better than me..why would they want to get off the teat?
 
Big Dan said:
roflol. Most people on welfare are living better than me..
Click to expand...

Of course they are! That's because they're earning additional income under the table running karaoke (with pirated hard drives) in the evenings!
 
Just to give a perspective from the other side of the coint, there are some people who truly need help and are decent people not trying to scam the system.

I happen to be one of them. I have explained my condition before, so I will not take the time to go into details. Sufficive to say that the brain damage I have recieved makes it impossible to take care of myself properly AND work full time. I could work full time theoretically but the effort required would make me sick enough that I would end up not being able to work again.


Even with the help I recieve, which inludes such extras as glasses, medicine and basic dental care, it is not enough to put a roof over one's head AND eat properly, which is why i work as much as I am physically able.

Karaoke was the pefect solution for me, I was good at it and at one point it allowed me to earn enough to pay for food from working one night a week, and even that was a stretch on me mentally.


I am lucky that the rules in my province allow a person to earn up to $1000 extra on top of what the Alberta government gives me. Being allowed to work as I am able allows me to achieve a small sense of accomplishment and dignity and I am truly thankful of it.

Other provinces aren't so generous.. For example in BC you are given an allowence of 900/month and you aren't supposed to work. In vancouver, rent starts about $800/month and thats for a complete ****hole that doesn't include utilies. Can u imagine trying to live on $100/month to pay for your bills AND food? I have done it, but let me tell u you eat about every other day.. Sometimes u only eat once a week.

And u wonder why some people on Welfare diliberately break the rules


just my two cents from someone who lives through it every day


-James
 
James,
I think anyone that qualifys for assistance should receive it. Here in the US alot of people abuse the system. I was told to apply for SSD after a series of 47 mini-strokes. I fought for almost 3 years trying to get it and finally gave up. I aldso beleive that people should work to the best of each personal ability...not only for the cash but for the self esteem that everyone gets from providing for themselves. Kudos to you for running your shows to supliment the assistance you receive.
 
James, I'm sorry if you felt my post was slamming anyone on public assistance. I have no issue with people who legitimately need help getting assistance. My sister is one of unable to hold a job due to illness. I thank God every day for the assistance she receives as we would never be able to afford her medications.

I'm talking about people like one of my neighbors who's an alcoholic and lives off the system. I see alcoholism as a treatable disease and take no issue with an alcoholic receiving assistance for rehab and while they're in getting back into the swing of things. At some point thought you need to get off your arse and get a job just like the rest of us. I hang out with him from time to time and it amazes me; The guy gets his rent paid, about $200/mo in food stamps, HEAP pays his electric bill, free cell phone with 100 minutes a month, full health coverage through Medicaid, and Medicaid will even pay for car service to take him back and fourth to doctor appointments. No one bothers him to go looking for a job. Once a year he has to go up to the office and recertifiy and he complains about having to do that.

I've been pondering whether I should shake his hand and say good deal you've got it made or should I hold him in disdain for mooching? Part of me says the rules make it to easy for people to get on and stay on public assistance. Another part of me says most people on public assistance for long periods of time are either un/undereducated leaving mostly unskilled labor positions for them. Other than pride, where is the motivation for getting up and going to a minimum wage job every day? By the time you assume the bills public assistance paid for you and pay for getting back and fourth to work every day, you're worse off then when on the teat. Once you gain a job you become ineligiable for many of the programs handed out to people to lazy to work. Why get up and bother with a dead end job everyday?

That being said as most of you know I've been out of work for quite a while. I make money here and there online but it would never be enough to support myself on my own. I went and applied for Medicaid to get some issues taken care of. Our total household income (not just mine) is over the limit so I cannot get any help with medical coverage. Meanwhile, I keep getting infection after infection because I have three bum teeth that I cannot afford the $800 or so to get yanked by a surgeon. What kills me if I went to Social Services and said I had no place to live they'd pay for me to stay in a hotel while on the waiting list for Section 8, give me full boat medical, food stamps, and a cash allowance.

It seems as if the people who just need a little help cannot get it meanwhile the people who are lazy and do nothing get red carpet treatment.
 
Thanks for the post, James. I'm glad you're in Alberta and I'm assuming on AISH. IT's certainly better than BC. However, in BC, you ARE allowed to make some money on the side. I'm not sure, but I think it's up to $500. My oldest daughter is on disability allowance and I know you can make some. It's certainly much better in Alberta however, as you are absolutely correct that they only give you about $900 total to live off. Ridiculous! The worst part is that they will give you more towards your housing if you have dependents, but NOT more for support (food, clothing, etc). They will expect a family of 5 to eat off the food allowance of ONE! And the kicker is this: if you have dependents and total allowable housing portion is $500, for example, and your rent is only $400, you do NOT get to keep the extra. So they will get you into a larger house, but they won't feed you or your family. I agree that in the past, there were some who really abused the system, and I knew of many who did, but with the new rules this is not so much the case anymore. The bad part is that it's those like yourself and my daughter and those who really need it that suffer. The idiots in Victoria have no clue what they're doing.
 
Just for the record, i didn't take any offense to the original post, I actually thought it was quite funny.

And Dan, i had no problems with your post either, there are quite a few people who take adantage of the system, i just wanted people to know that not everyone does.. :)

-James
 
glad to hear we did not offend you as I am sure no-one intended to do so ; )
 
I think the other side to people abusing the system is that so many people see people taking advantage of it that they are like, screw this if they can then I can. It's a shame that our world is coming to the point that people who are upstanding citizens have to work three times as hard to make it.
 
Well I think I attempted to start a thread with a joke, and apparently everyone is so depressed that they decided to crap it out. Okey Dokey. Took a shot.
 
JoeChartreuse said:
Well I think I attempted to start a thread with a joke, and apparently everyone is so depressed that they decided to crap it out. Okey Dokey. Took a shot.
Click to expand...

Winter Blues my friend. :)
 
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