is it wrong to let your 18 year old be your designated driver?

[Steve]

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[Steve]

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[Steve]

screw it! %

 

[eiramnoaj]

:hah::laugh:


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[mrsred1]

****.

 

[kewpon addict]

U on a Mac?

I do NOT have a mac! Guess I am just SPECIAL!:lol: %%%%%%

 

[tooty]

oh i do usually the censored version. Not that i am a prude i drop "F" bombs like mice drop poop.

But I can not stand that you have African american (politically correct) people who cry about slavery and being called that and then can say it whenever they want and its ok to them. Why would you want to continue to use that word when it meant such horrible things to their culture

TAGLINE NOMINATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[eecwz]

This is how you guys kept yourselves busy while I was out for lunch? Testing out % signs? And I thought I my day was boring. :lol:

:shesaid: :laugh: Technically I didn't get lunch but I have been gone since 7 and look at all I missed.

 

[kjjone]

My kids aren't perfect, neither am I, and I don't expect them to be perfect.

However, I still fail to understand how it's relevant to teach my kids to be responsible (not driving drunk) by having to help me out of a situation in which I am being irresponsible (drinking and not being able to drive). A lesson learned by negative example can be valid, but that doesn't make teaching lessons by positive example doesn't work.

I want my kids to learn there is always choice. INCLUDING the choice of: if you go there in your car, don't drink at all (it isn't necessary to have a good time IMHO) because if you do, you might drink to excess, and that gets into the area of irresponsibility.

But I will freely admit I despise the taste of alcohol, my parents/grandparents were/are constant altered-staters and they don't have a care in the world if they drive drunk (though they should know better). Their behavior taught me my current attitude, but I can't say it would have been any less valid to learn that lesson from a better/more positive or different type of example.

Ok here is my take on the situation.

I can completely understand the reason you have strong feeling on the alcohol. I myself very rarely drink as in I can go years in between. I do not feel it is necessary in order for me to have a god time. I am perfectly capable of making an **** out of myself on my own and having fun doing it.

I do not believe anyone is saying hey you should all go out have some drinks and call your kids to have them drive you home so they can learn a lesson.

However say in the op situation it would seem that on most occasions they have one of them not drink and be the DD however they would like to be able to both go out and have some drinks and know they are not going to get in the car and drive so they would like to have the 18 year old drive. I see this an not a problem as they are being taught (as others have also said) that you do not believe it is ok to go and drive after drinks and you are being responsible. However if the family does not drink at all as in your case then you have to teach your children though talks about the dangers and why not to do it.

I would also hope that this is not the only time they have talked to their kid about driving under the influence. I myself have had talks with my oldest since he was 14 about this. and of the need arose for me to have him drive because I had drank i would do so as to per say practice what you preach


I would also hope that this would not open a door for people (as i am sure in some cases this does happen) to drink regularly and rely on the kids.

I see you are passionate about your stance and that is understandable but I think sometimes people need to open their minds and look at the individual situations. And for me the average responsible parent(s) that have one that stays sober every time that would like to not have to worry about them both staying sober and be able to enjoy some drinks knowing their ride home was covered by the adult child, I think is ok and again shows them you practice what you preach.

 

[chattynatty]

Kathy - this is my personal opinion but even if you don't drink there might come a time your kids are out and the person who drove them drinks and the lesson is don't also let someone drive you home if they have been drinking. I do not drink but if we are out and on the rare occasion my DH has a drink then I drive. Our thoughts are we will not drive with someone who has had even 1 drink. In the 15 years I have known my DH he has never ever had more than one drink out. this is not a negative experience however we never take the chance. Just our personal way to insure that if we were ever in an accident we would never have to question if alcohol could have contributed.

 

[linkin]

What about people who don't drink? I don't drink, so my kids will never have this teachable moment. Are they missing out? Going to be more susceptible to drinking/driving themselves because they never had to DD me? Should I send an email to my friends offering the services of my kid as a DD for hire so he can get this lesson from someone else, kind of like a tutor?

I am staying in the judgmental corner on this.

do your kids understand all the ins and outs of alcohol abuse and use responsibly? they need to know all the troubles associated with alcohol, long before they are legally able to consume. most pre teens have already experimented with alcohol and if there is an addictive gene, that is more of an issue. otherwise it is like a kid in a candy store when they turn 21. and no, the designated driver aspect is the minutest detail. but driving with any alcohol in ones system is a legal bother and risky.