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suicide is selfish

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spunkey monkey

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tongiht i went to a friends house thinking that we would just all be hanging out or whatever, well we get there and everyone is drinking no biggie, the friend i went to see tells me he took some pills, again no biggie (he happens to do this sometimes) well i realise that it is a bigger deal than i thought when he started making comments like "the end is near", "i am almost in paridise" and "i have seen the truth through the ones that have passed on" i then asked him how many and what he had taken. come to find out he took 3 different pills 5 of each, i looked at the bottles and he is only suppose to take 1/2 a pill 2 times a day so he took way more than he was should plus he was drinking hard liquer, and he has a heart condition (he has had 2 heart attacks in the last few months) i know i should have said something when i saw him drinking cuz i know he isnt suppose to but he is a grown man and well will do as he wishes. so me and my other friend try to get him to go to the er and he refuses i knew better than to call 911 cuz he would have taken off. so we sat there for 3 hours talking to him giving him reasons why he should go, but still no go but we did get his cup from him and poured it out and hid the alcohol. then he got up and said he was going to bed i didnt think this was a good idea but everyone else (but the friend trying to help me get him to the er ) thought that was what he should do. he walked in his room and i just broke down crying there was nothing else i could do i felt so helpless. my one friend tried to console me and told me i did everything i could. i got up and went into his room and asked him to look at me i told him i was sorry that i couldnt help him and began crying, he told me not to cry and that everything will be ok and that i am so caring, (i'm thinking yeah well alot of good caring does) i told him again that i was sorry and that even though i am pissed at him i still care about him and love him (friendship love) anyway i give him one last hug and tellhim to sleep on his side in case he ended up getting sick. as i am about to leave he tells me to tell everyone "good-bye" for him, long silence, then he says "i mean goodnight"
its not like we havent all gone through this before we have lost quite a few friends and 2 were suicides and he saw how that effected everyone, i just cant believe after seeing the affects he could be that selfish.
 
That is terrible but you can't blame yourself since if he does go that far it isn't your fault. You tried to stop him and help him and you have done all you can. You are right though it is selfish to commit suicide since it brings great suffering to friends and family.
 
It is selfish and I wouldn't bother yourself about it Spunkey because if he is going to do it there is nothing anyone can do to stop him. Don't waste your time.

I bent over backward trying to save a friend of my (years ago) and she still did herself in. A college of mine did so as well even though we had been out to dinner and to the Opera that evening. No signs of what was going to happen. he just went home and blew his brains out. I give up. If someone is going to do it, fine, but don't bother me about it if you are not going to listen to sound advice.

Selfish? **** RIGHT!!
 
Thats right if he was really serious he will do it no matter what, the only way to stop him is get him admitted to a nut house. Have them put him in a stray jacket.
 
ANGLOIRISH said:
It is selfish and I wouldn't bother yourself about it Spunkey because if he is going to do it there is nothing anyone can do to stop him. Don't waste your time.

I bent over backward trying to save a friend of my (years ago) and she still did herself in. A college of mine did so as well even though we had been out to dinner and to the Opera that evening. No signs of what was going to happen. he just went home and blew his brains out. I give up. If someone is going to do it, fine, but don't bother me about it if you are not going to listen to sound advice.

Selfish? **** RIGHT!!
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ok yes it is selfish but how can i not bother myself with it he is my friend, he and i have been through alot. i am the type of person that will fight forever for someone his life has meaning and even if he doesnt see it i do and even if the worst comes at least i know i have done everything in my power to show him the true love of friendship. i am sorry your friends couldnt be saved and i think that is the reason you have such a cold out look on this to me a human life is worth saving and i will say it again i will do anything for that to happen
 
Chrisl0 said:
Thats right if he was really serious he will do it no matter what, the only way to stop him is get him admitted to a nut house. Have them put him in a stray jacket.
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to be honest i wish there was some way i could get him commited
 
Good luck, Spunkey. Don't blame yourself if he does succeed in taking his life. The ultimate decision is his remember. People like that don't care that others want them to live.

I am sure Joe (not his real name) didn't give a second thought to his wife and two young boys 3 years old and 2 months old. They grew up not knowing their father. He was a brilliant young lawyer and seemed to have anything. Suicide has no class distinction. It strikes in all classes.
 
good luck with that... I listen to NPR at work and there was this guy whos son broke into people shosues and did some crazy **** and they couldn't get him committed...

I jsut say **** him and walk away from it. Firstly he didn't even really try, thats one of those call for help suicides... a LOOK AT ME IM SO HURT IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF... then take jsut enought o cause panic, but nowhere near enough to die.

If that fool really wanted to be dead he would have taken all three BOTTLES not 5 pills each
 
spunkey monkey said:


to be honest i wish there was some way i could get him commited
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There is... had you called 911 he would have had no choice in the matter. Next time, call 911.
 
I used to think of taking pills myself. Siiigh it was a bad time.

But I know suicide is selfish and I have no time for people like that. If someone wishes to end their life then do it. Don't expect me to pick up the pieces after you.

Monkey you did the best you could, it would be great to have you as a friend if I was in that situation. You did the best you could, when in reality everything tells you to walk away and let him deal, no one is worth hassling over...I kinda agree with slack on this one.

If he had really wanted death he would have taken more. Just like when people slit their wrists, it annoys the crap out of me 'oh I want to die'...'ok then slit it the right way already'. It is beyond hope and pointless.
 
ANGLOIRISH said:
Good luck, Spunkey. Don't blame yourself if he does succeed in taking his life. The ultimate decision is his remember. People like that don't care that others want them to live.
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i know better than to blame myself
 
GoingNova said:


There is... had you called 911 he would have had no choice in the matter. Next time, call 911.
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if we would have called 911 he would have just taken off and then ended up who knows where
 
there is more to the reason he did it the way he did ok remember he is not thinking straight when i explain this... he has a 3 year old daughter and he is legally blind (so he can still see somewhat) him and his daughters mother broke up earlier this year. he is contantly told by other people he basically has no place in society because he cant find a job and collects SSI, he has a heart condition and the drs say he probablly wont live past 45. so he took out a life insurence policy and his daughter is the benificiary, so if he commits suicide and it looks like an acciedent she will still get the money however if it is obvious like if he hung himself or slit his wrists she would be left with nothing. i told him he means more to her alive but he seems to think she would be better off with out him. so in a really messed up way he is thinking about his daughter
 
spunkey monkey said:


to be honest i wish there was some way i could get him commited
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Have to do what Nova said and call 911 next time he does it.
 
spunkey monkey said:

if we would have called 911 he would have just taken off and then ended up who knows where
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One of you could have said you had to use the bathroom, and called from in there. Seriously, you are not professionals in this matter, and you really should leave it to them to handle things like this.

That being said, people who say they are going to commit suicide and mean it, usually do. When people say they are going to, and don't, it is usually a cry for attention. It sounds to me like this friend loves the "drama".
 
Let him make stupid **** decisions. Thats the problem with the world today, people caring. If people want to die, give them the finger and go on about your business and do not let them get to you. Personally I would have socked them a good one for being stupid. If people want to be that way, make sure you let them know that in doing that they are nothing but a worthless waste of genetic material.
 
I would actually agree with that, but if you really care for the person and he/she kills themselves and you knew in advanced about it and think you could of stopped it then the person might carry it as a burden for the rest of their life.
 
Hey one of yous could have called me and I would have called... you know that he wouldnt have thought anything was going to happen if yous said I am calling Alicia.... than I would have called 911 and there would have ben help.. I know we can think about this stuff now, but if it happens again and I am not with yous.. we can do it that way.
 
aliciamarie02 said:
Hey one of yous could have called me and I would have called... you know that he wouldnt have thought anything was going to happen if yous said I am calling Alicia.... than I would have called 911 and there would have ben help.. I know we can think about this stuff now, but if it happens again and I am not with yous.. we can do it that way.
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you know i never even thought of that, thanks i will be sure to do that if it happens again
 
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